Tonight, the Miss America USA pageant will wrap up and we’ll finally know who we’ll be sending locks of our hair and mixtapes with Dashboard songs to. Time to take a look at Amber Marie Collins, AKA Miss New York USA’s photo reel. She just graduated from NYU Steinhardt and “teaches an ASD preschool class at The Gramercy School.†Lets see, standard gown picture? Check. Bikini shots? Check. Same practiced smile in all the photos? Double check. GAH! What. Is. This?
No explanation is offered on her Facebook page as to whether or not she was on the set of Brian De Palma’s remake of The Glass Menagerie. And although we have to give her credit for breaking the mold of standard drab beauty pageant photos, who designed this dress made of Pogs? And why did the photographer ask her to give him the “Ash from Alien†face?
Perhaps more importantly, why does her Facebook profile say she’s from Los Angeles, California? What is the Miss USA pageant hiding? Who can we meet in an abandoned parking garage to get some answers? While we figure this out, enjoy the greatest beauty pageant moment of all time, courtesy of the Palmetto state.
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